There are many differences betweent the two stories about home. In Didion's "On Going Home" It sounds like it is more of a chore than a priviledge. She is not comfortable in going home because when she does she is not herself when she is there. When her family is around they suck her into "their" ways. She does not even think of her husband the same when she is with them. Going home for her was not something she looked forward. Personally when I talk about home it is a happy place it is never something that feels negative. The words "going home" right away signal that it is not something that is willing, it is as if she feels like she owes her family a visit every now and then. In Lee's "Coming Home Again" he speaks of home in a good way. He has many pleasant memories that relate to home. His mother and him had always gotten along and he loved to spend time with her. However, he also had his unpleasant memories as well. Even though he mentions some of his unhappy times or memories that were not something he enjoys he never makes "coming home" a chore.Didion's title is more of a negative story. It also contains the title that can be seen in more of a negative light. It is showing a sense of guilt and remorse. She does not like the way she is when she is at home.
Another way to look at the differences can depend on who you are directing your title towards. For instance, when you talk to a friend or someone who is your own age you are more likely to us the phrase, "going home for the weekend" as opposed to "coming home for the weekend". To a friend saying "coming home" would sound funny. However, to a family member that still lives at the place you call home you are more likely to say, "I am coming home this weekend". When talking to friends you almost make it sound bad that you are going home, but to your family you want them to think you are happy to be coming home. It is a dialouge that you use differently in different situations.
Personally I dont think there is a big difference in the words being said as much as there are the stories behind them. When I talk to my mom I tell her I will be coming home and I am usually pretty happy about doing it. I never usually have a complaint about going home. But when I talk to friends at school and I plan to go home on that weekend I usually make it seem like I really dont want to leave but I have to go home. It is all in context. Whenever you say it you are always saying it to different people and different age groups. Even if you are talking to someone who is not in your family but lives in the same time I will often tell them I am COMING HOME.
Therefore, you can take the titles of the stories in many different ways. It could be how a person actually feels about their home and family life or it could very well be just the way people talk to others. Interpretations are taken differntly. Everyone sees things differently and that is why we are all unique. The conversations people have together are all different. The way we converse with others all depends on the relationships we have.